“An excellent wife who can find?  She is far more precious than jewels.”

Proverbs 31:10

When my girls were little, their life aspirations included becoming a professional horse rider, a pig farmer and marrying daddy.  As noble, lucrative and sweetly peculiar as those aspirations may be, I hope to inspire them to also pursue a most noble but poorly paying and undervalued job:

Super Wife.

Oh, don’t leave just yet. I’m not saying this role and only this role to the exclusion of the other parts we play that benefit our communities, our culture and our churches.  We absolutely have specific things to accomplish in life (Eph. 2:10), specific gifts given to us by God for the building up of our church family (Eph. 4:12), and specific skills that can be developed and leveraged for positive influence.  (Prov. 22:29)

But a fresh appraisal of this vital job is long overdue.  It’s time to pull it out from under the proverbial doormat where it has been wrongly shoved, to our disadvantage and the detriment of our families.

In Proverbs 31, the famous acrostic poem that provides a comprehensive resume of the virtuous woman, God prefaces the study of what she is like by providing a stunning picture of what she is worth.  Friend, if we could rightly understand this, I’m convinced we’d see greater success in applying the rest of the study.

“An excellent wife who can find?  She is far more precious than jewels.”

Proverbs 31:10

The word “excellent” here describes a woman who is competent, mighty & capable.  And we learn that she is two things:  Rare and Valuable.

Let’s first consider her rarity.

Is she rare because God only blesses certain women with the capacity to become excellent?  The answer would be a resounding “nope”.  Any woman whose heart is regenerated by Jesus Christ is a new creation.  (I Cor. 5:17)  By virtue of the Holy Spirit indwelling and empowering her life, she is able to realize the God-glorifying, family-blessing breed of womanhood outlined in this chapter of Proverbs. (Gal. 5:16-18, 22-23, Eph. 1:3-4)

Why so rare then?  I think guys and girls are equally to blame but for different reasons.

Guys first.

In his commentary on Proverbs, Charles Bridges suggests that a potential reason why virtuous women are rarely found is because they are rarely sought.  Our world, and sadly sometimes our churches, are full of dishonorable men who seek and value in potential wives, things other than virtue: Physical beauty, permissive personalities, physical beauty, accomplishments.  (Did I mention physical beauty?) The blame for that folly is on them and they will bear the disappointment of their choice when they get past the dazzling exterior and find that what’s inside may be grossly lacking.

But ladies…

The blame for our catering to these shallow preferences and whims is on us. We can act as closet marketing specialists, holding our own unofficial focus groups.  Based on grocery store magazines, shallow encounters, and majority opinions, we find out what the average man wants and then craft our product to suit their desires.  What a waste.  Instead of aspiring to excellence by God’s definition, we cater willingly to the substandard desires of empty-headed men.  In our insecurities we elevate their valuation of our worth over God’s definition of what a noble woman should be and in so doing, stunt the development of what could be splendid character.

Too many men set the bar low.  Too many women oblige.  Though it doesn’t have to be this way, an excellent wife is, unfortunately, a rare find.

And what of her value in the eyes of God?

 “…She is far more precious than jewels.”

Make sure you don’t read that too quickly and gloss over it:

Not “as precious as jewels”.

Not “more precious than jewels.”

“Far more precious than jewels.”

If that doesn’t startle you, be shocked at how finite the list is of what the Bible deems “more precious” than jewels or treasure.  I could only find three others: Wisdom, God’s commandments and a genuine, tested faith.*  Not a shabby list.  How intriguing that “an excellent wife” was the only other thing I could find that made this list.

No other person.  No other role.  No other quality made this exclusive club.  I haven’t yet wrapped my head around what that fully means, but we can safely conclude that being an excellent wife is a pretty big deal.

It may not land me a trophy, or recognition in an esteemed publication, or more money in the bank, but to be the best thing that ever happened to my man, humanly speaking, is a pretty good aim in my mind.  To think I could make his life outrageously better and more effective than it could ever have been otherwise, is a worthy pursuit in my books.

So alongside the overarching goal of living for the glory of God, and the other aims we will have in life based on our gifts, abilities and calling, I invite you to join me in adding “Super Wife” to our list of aspirations.  To fail to do so is to squander our blood-bought opportunity for excellence and to abdicate one of the greatest opportunities for influence we could ever possess.

Cape anyone?

*   Job 28:12-19, Prov. 3:15, Psalm 19:10, Psalm 119:127, I Peter 1:7